Observe, to the left, a standard, white, store-bought egg. Compare this unremarkable example, dear readers, to what is clearly a paragon of poultry production! This thing is a monster. It has subsequently become the standard to which all other chicken creations must be compared. (Seriously, we haven't eaten it. Every other generously sized egg is immediately measured against "THE BIG ONE").
* the producer of these colossal spawn has since been identified. unsurprisingly, it is the maverick hen with an unshakable sense of independence and a thirst for adventure. this manifests itself as a particular penchant for the consumption of our neighbor's birdseed...this addiction to pillaging and plundering off premises, so to speak, would normally result in a swift and inescapable sentence. but. those are damn big eggs.
